Sunday, March 2, 2008

It's not that Easy....Jet.

Due to a number of factors, I missed my flight from Berlin to London. However, this time, something was different. There was a factor that is constantly involved when I fuck up, that simply was not there this time. A factor that is the source of about 104 % of everything bad that ever happens to me. That factor, is me.

You see, the train that is only supposed to take 40 minutes, took about twice as long. And when we got there(a half-hour before the plane was set to leave), a somewhat heavy set woman tells the 20 people who were on that train, that checkin is closed. There is nothing she can do. To me, there is one major flaw in her statement. There was something she could do, she just couldn't be bothered. She could have called the staff on the airplane(who were probably wondering why 20 passengers just decided not to show up) and told them: "Don't go yet". I really wanted to ask the heavy set lady where she had been hiding since 1945. I hear Argentina is nice. At that point, I was pretty sure of the fact that Germans hate us. That is not the case. They just hate me.

I do realize that I'm kind of a douche. They did too. Linus and I bought our tickets at the same time, he got priority boarding, I didn't. Then they stop me in security and tell me that the carry-on-luggage that worked perfectly fine London entre Berlin, is now too big. So I told them: "Look, you've already made me miss one flight. I'm not missing another one and I'm not paying you to fuck me in the ear. Let me through. Please." This sentence worked to the extent of them getting even more persistent. I tried squeezing my bag into the little metal-frame, no luck. It was about an inch too big. After having squabbled with them for 10 minutes, I took matters into my own hands. I decided to wear my clothes. Correction, I decided to wear ALL of my clothes. This included: 2 cardigans, 2 lumberjack shirts, 1 hoodie, 8 t-shirts and 1 jacket. The security staff at Schönefeld airport now know me as, "Ajax, superhero!". Personally, I think I looked like a meatball that, somehow, got itself stuck on a stick. After having gone through security, I quickly removed all of these garments and re-packed. Go me.

In other news, because of the airplane scandal(and other things, discount at supreme/stussy etc etc), I'm officially dead-broke until the 14th. For normal people, being broke suuuucks. I can't really say it does for me. You see, I'm an excellent sleeper. Since the term "excellent" is so commonly used, most people would associate it with "good" or even "great". When I say I'm an excellent sleeper, I mean to say that I'm fucking spectacular. What can I say, it's cheap fun.

No comments: