Can I be electric too?

Here are some pictures from my first week in New York. It feels great being back. Last night we went to an awesome punk concert on a boat that drove around on the east river from 1-4 am. Good fun.

you fucking cow.

My friend told me something the other day, and I feel that I should probably tell you guys about it. He went to South America for a couple of months and supposedly, it is totally okay and fairly common to have sex with farm animals there. Not only that, it is said to be customary for boys to have their sexual debut with a farm animal. He heard this from several sources, non-related to each other. To me, that means either it's true, or they just have a "let's make ourselves seem like humongous idiots to the rest of the world" kind of pact. He even said one guy told him he had sex with a chicken, a procedure that subsequently killed the chicken. The fact that he told a relative stranger that, not only erases my doubts that he actually did it, but also that it is considered totally normal.

It's amazing to me how the cultural differences can be that vast. I just can't seem to grasp how the motto of a human being could be: "If I'm going to eat it, I might as well have sex with it first". That being said, Hannibal Lecter is more famous than I am, maybe I shouldn't judge. Somehow, I just can't help looking down on it, though. If we were talking about sex with an animal that has street-cred(like a tiger, or a killer-whale, or something), I would probably be more okay with it. Anyone who manages to lure a killer-whale out, trap it and then fuck it, deserves nothing less than his own TV-show.

So why did this phenomenon appear? Well, it can probably get lonely up in the mountains/in the jungle and who really cares about if your sex-partner has two or four legs? If you think about it, there are many perks to this idea, at least for many guys. There are no dates required, no strings attached, and if your partner gives you a "is that all you got"-look afterwards, you can just tip her over and leave. I really feel like cows got a shitty break in this world. I mean, you wouldn't try to fuck a horse. Not only because your offspring would come out looking like Penelope Cruz, a horse would kick the shit out of you. Cows can't do anything about the situation. Since their level of antagonism pretty much only goes as far as chewing their food three times, instead of the regular four, I'd say all you have to do to fuck a cow, is know which part is the front and which part is the back. Illiterate or not, those are some pretty basic anatomy-skills.

I'm also still trying to decide whether I feel sorry for the animals or not. On the one hand, I don't think little Jose 14 is going to invoke any serious pain compared to an 800-pound bull. On the other hand, I wouldn't want a mouse to fuck me in my sleep, regardless of how much bigger I am than him.

A lot of people would explain this by saying that human beings are only animals, driven by our sexual lust. Are you serious? We've been to the moon. Not fucking things that go "moo" afterwards, doesn't seem like an impossible task for us to handle.

In the kitchen

Best song played last night:

R Kelly - Ignition Remix
Uploaded by diablo75

Life is all about choices.

I simply can not hold this argument in any longer. We are presented with certain battles in life, such as fat vs non-fat, partner vs single, black vs white or Michael Moore vs everyone else. But let's face it, none of these things really matter. There are certain battles within us that need be prioritized. Battles that, if not properly dealt with, will eventually tear our body in two. I came across such a battle yesterday, and it hit me like a brick in the face. I'm still somewhat shaky, but I need to make a decision. I'm talking, of course, about what I prefer: The O.C or Gossip Girl.

First things first: The main couples. Not only are Serena/Dan similar to Ryan/Marissa in the sense that they are in a kind of Yin-Yang relationship, they also provide the necessary drama. By "necessary", I mean the relationships that one actually gives a shit about. Blair & Chuck's relationship is less relevant than the olympics. Now, not only are Ryan and Marissa initially further apart(Dan's dad is a rockstar/gallery owner who lives in a huge loft in Williamsburg, seriously), their drama is way more intriguing. And even though I prefer both Serena over Marissa and Dan over Ryan, that round has to go to The O.C. Oh, and Anna Stern might be the coziest girl in the world, ever. My need for making her my girlfriend is only halted for two reasons. 1. She would never do me. 2. She isn't real. If you disregard those two minor indiscretions, we should have our first child when I'm financially stable. Actually, that last bit could probably count as reason number three. That being said, Chuck Bass is the man. Gossip girl wins that one. But if you consider the various factors that make up a good show like this, (plot, girls, guys, drama, love etc) there aren't many shows that can beat the O.C season 1. While anxiously awaiting GG season two, I'm watching the O.C season 1 all over again. I know, I should get a day job. Wait, or maybe I won't.

I'm trying out a new concept of shooting a story this week, I'll be sure to let you know how that goes. And I'll be posting some New York pictures later during the week. Say, Thursday?


// R

Terry, at time are we meeting?

Anyone who has followed this blog could probably guess that I like Terry Richardson. Anyone who integrates fashion/photography with humor is always going to be fucking spectacular in my book.

I finally managed to acquire and set up the domain-name that I've been chasing after for like a year now. In accordance to me gaining this new web-space, I also updated my website. Hence, my new website is:

WWW.ROBINJONSSON.COM

Potential part II

Some people are just destined to do things. DaVinci was always a genius, Gandhi was always a lesbian and Gretzky was alway a hockey-player. They simply possessed something special. I could train for 100 years straight, and I would still never be as good at hockey as Gretzky. I don't believe in fate, but I do believe in assessing, knowing and then living your life according to your limits. This kid is off to a really bad start. When I was a kid, I was afraid of the dark. However, I was not afraid of the dark when it was light outside and the "darkness" had the same shape as me.

Sweden shoot.

So, these are some "behind the scenes" photos from my last shoot in Sweden. I'll let you know who it's for+where and when you can get it, all in good time.

Actually, the picture below needs some explanation. Since we were shooting by the sea, the wind was an undeniable influence. By that, I mean that some of our stuff went flying straight into the ocean. For some reason, everyone thought it'd be a good idea if I went in and got them.

Potential.

This is a girl I shot last week for a British publication. She was 13 and really talented, actually. She did her first gig when she was ten, and last year she modeled in Japan. When I was 10, I did nothing and when I was 12, I did even less. This girl has potential.

The olympic games

I'm not a huge fan of the olympic games. They're just not what they used to be. First of all, nobody's even naked anymore. Second, I can't help but feel that most people who compete in the olympics, are absolute fools. Not only are 50 % of them competing at shit that nobody cares about(yes, I like football), 98% of them also end up in a position that nobody cares about. Hence, if you mix the elements of "Skeet-shooting" with "47th place" and "practised for 17 years to get to this point", you know what you'd get? You get a very delicate recipe, called: "A waste of fucking time." Exhibit A being the fact that all of you are now looking up what the hell Skeet-shooting is.

One thing I do like about the Olympics(other than the fact that Lebron is there), is the fact that every country is secretly waging war against each other, with nobody being hurt. Except for that girl who upset Tonya Harding, bad call. Anyways, wouldn't it be great if wars were settled like this? If England and Argentina just sat down and said:

"Okay, we know you want the Falklands back. We want to keep them."
"Why would you want to keep them?"
"It's quite simple, because...uhm...You know what, we'll race you for them."
"We'll what?"
"The strongest runner from our country, probably someone from our overrated football-team, will race the strongest one from yours."
"Okay, and what does the winner get?"
"The Falklands, you idiot?"
"Right. And we want Heather Mills."
"It would be cheaper buying the Falklands back."

Sorry, I got sidetracked. I hate Heather Mills.

Anyways, back to the olympics. I'm not sure what I think about China hosting the games this year. On one hand, I feel that the games should be completely independent from all political stuff. The nazi-olympics of 1936 being the flagship of that argument(Granted, Jesse Owens did win 4 gold medals.) On the other hand, the games should be representative of goodwill and sportsmanship. Try telling team-monk up in the mountains that team-red on the other side of the border are brilliant examples of how one should behave towards other people.

Question: Why are javelins being thrown vast distances, in a stadium full of people? I mean, if one nano-second can change the outcome of the 100-meter dash, can't one little slip send a javelin hurling towards 8-year old Johnny? After all, he's only attending the games because his father owns the factory where the rest of the people who are at the stadium work. He doesn't deserve that. If anything, his dad is the one who should have to experience what it would feel like to get a kidney-piercing.

I can't say I care enough about the olympics to trash-talk it too passionately. I just know that the if they introduce cars in the olympics, I...probably won't be able to do anything. But that would suck.

there's nothing like the place I shouldn't call home.

As an adoptee(casually made up word), I am now reaping the benefits of the glorious nation that is Sweden. Sweet.